Boy and girl relationship meaning of

Outline of relationships - Wikipedia

boy and girl relationship meaning of

There are 4 predictable stages that couples experience in a dating relationship. At each stage, there is often a decision (sometimes more thoughtfully arrived at. Boy- Girl Relationships in Islam In islam can muslim men and women be By ' sexual pleasure' I mean all the aspects, including the emotional aspect, that lead . A Relationship is the way in which two or more people or things are connected, or the state of being connected, close association between two.

Both halves of a couple will notice weaknesses and differences or flaws. Some of those perpetual issues or differences such as free-spending or frugal, neat and orderly or sloppy and disorganized, interested in lots of time together or more involved in outside activities begin to emerge. At this stage of the relationship, couples will take note of the differences and may even begin to complain or attempt to problem-solve.

As intimacy develops between the two people, more self-disclosure emerges, both verbally and nonverbally as couples act in ways that are more like how they are in their daily life.

This is when the big question emerges even more strongly: Pushing for an answer; however, may cause real problems in the relationship.

Outline of relationships

Each person needs to listen to their own inner voice and wisdom. There is no need to rush through this important stage and every reason to go slowly. Open and honest conversations should be happening as couples plan their present and future together. Questions about children, finances, careers, future goals and lifestyle should be discussed more fully.

Differences are normal and couples will learn about themselves and their relationship as they note how they handle these differences with each other. This is also an important stage for couples to use to evaluate the relationship and their ability to be part of an emotionally intelligent relationship.

But, isn't it logical that if you don't follow the rules about having sex before marriage that you are not very likely to follow the rules about having sex after marriage. Many young Muslim girls never expected such things as unwed motherhood, unwanted children, and abortion to enter their lives, but those terrible things do sometimes happen when you have wrong relationships; they happen much more often than anyone wants to admit. Unwed pregnancy, how would you like to tell your parents about this one?

boy and girl relationship meaning of

Even worse, you would be bringing a child into the world and this child may be very unwanted, are you going to be able to care for this child and the sacred soul Allah has placed within that child? Or what about an abortion, not only is that likely to be committing a great sin, but you would be killing a new human being growing within you.

Does it make you feel sad to think about this? It makes me sad.

a boy and girl relationship definition | English definition dictionary | Reverso

Here are some depressing statistics about suicide. Sexually active boys are more than twice as likely to have depression and almost ten times more likely to attempt suicide than boys who wait until marriage. Teenage girls who have premarital sex are three times more likely to have depression than girls who aren't sexually active. Also, teenage girls who are sexually active are about three times more likely to attempt suicide than those who aren't sexually active.

See what I mean about being depressing? What did you expect? By the way, know for sure what I am saying here applies to boys just as much as to girls. Islam is about equality and boys and girls are most definitely equally responsible to keep themselves away from wrong relationships and pure for marriage. So you only did it because you were totally sure you were going to marry him or her, so why wait. Some people believe that you have to have lots of practice to get good at sex and if you are not already good at sex before you marry you will have a second rate love life when married.

Well, contrary to that popular belief, studies show those who do choose to wait for sex until marriage are not doomed to a second-class sex life at all. Instead they usually have significantly higher levels of sexual satisfaction and marital contentment. I guess nothing is so romantic and erotic as having a marriage partner who has never experienced those most intimate moments with anyone but you.

Seems reasonable to me! Well personally I trust the word of Allah not the opinion of some teen boy or girl with highly active hormones affecting their judgment. This is what Allah has to say about fornication the technically correct name for illegal sexual intercourse. Well, I have to say that fun is most definitely not a good measure of what is right or wrong. No, of course he is going to make going against the Will of Allah seem like fun.

For those who are Muslim, he will attempt to turn them away from Allah.

boy and girl relationship meaning of

One method shaitan uses quite successfully is to make people feel unworthy because of the sin they committed to have fun. Once you feel unworthy of Allah it is much easier to turn away from Him. To prove that all sex is natural, they give examples of wild animals, like monkeys, who have all kinds of sex all over the place with no inhibitions.

They attempt to degrade human beings to the level of wild animals, and then justify their deeds by finding examples of free sexual behaviour in the animal world. They are, in the Qur'anic expression, "like cattle, nay they are more astray; they are the heedless ones. One of the purposes of Islam is to establish that we are not animals, and to put us on the right path so that we will not behave like animals.

I know I would. Unfortunately studies have shown that the more time a couple spends alone together, the more likely they are to wind up in bed! And that is true even if they begin with the firmest intention of abstinence.

boy and girl relationship meaning of

Best not to believe you can resist temptation if you are given too much opportunity. Do you think you can be involved in a wrong boy and girl relationship, particularly if it includes sex, and keep being a good Muslim? Can you pray and fast with sincerity and carry on an unlawful sexual relationship? I think that might not be possible. Going against the Will of Allah in a matter so important as sex means that you will be more likely to go against the Will of Allah in other matters also, possibly eventually leaving Islam.

How terrible for your life, how terrible for the whole Muslim Ummah, we could possibly lose the benefits of Islam for the whole world just because some could not wait for the pleasures of sex until it is made right for them after marriage. What a huge price to pay.

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Then of course there is the price you could end up paying for eternity. What if on Judgment Day the price you must pay for your wrong relationships and unlawful sexual behaviour is that you are sent to Hellfire instead of to Paradise? Some young Muslims give little thought to Judgment Day, but we know Judgment Day is certain and everything will happen exactly the way we have been told by Allah through revelation. Consider how you would feel then.

It would indeed be an awesome mistake to not take this possibility with all the necessary seriousness. This list could go on forever so I will make this the last, but it involves something so very special, so very precious, that even without all the other costs this one alone makes wrong relationships between boys and girls, young men and young women, far too high a price to pay.

This cost involves the relationship between husband and wife in marriage. InshaAllah, you will be married for a very long time and of course you want that married relationship to be very special and very wonderful in every way.

But the reality is that any relationships you have with members of the opposite sex before marriage chip away some of what should make the relationship between husband and wife so exquisitely special.

Allah wanted to make the marriage relationship so very special that married couples would care so deeply for each other that neither partner would ever want to stray through adultery or separate through divorce. It should be the most wonderful worldly relationship possible. The more a married couple has to share exclusively between themselves, the more special and unique the relationship, in particular the sexual relationship, in a marriage becomes.

So the reason that relationships before marriage make your husband or wife less special to you is that to some degree whatever has been done with others before makes your marriage partner just one more in the line of persons who have shared that part of the relationship with you which should have been held as a trust for the one you marry. By not waiting for that special moment when you first marry you make that special moment no longer special.

This is true of all aspects of relationships before marriage, but it is of particular importance for that most special of all parts of the marriage relationship, the sexual part. Sex is a precious gift from Allah. This gift can only be given away for the first time once. Wouldn't this be a great gift for that one person who will be with you for the rest of your life? I hope from this discussion of boy-girl relationships before marriage you are now better able to weigh what you get objectively against how much you have to give.

Be honest with yourself, can you really say it is worth it? It seems the benefits of waiting until marriage are so great that no other possible choice should be possible. A good marriage is still possible, but sadly, less likely. So if you have already lost the opportunity to make your marriage the most special it could possibly be by waiting to partake in the rights of marriage, then you should immediately begin doing what ever you can to make your chances for a successful marriage as good as possible.

And, you should be prepared after marriage to treat the one you marry with an extra degree of love, tenderness, and kindness far beyond anything you have ever experienced before. Please know that I have absolutely no doubt that the limits of boy-girl relationships before marriage set by Allah are correct and offer by far the best way to ensure a happy and successful marriage. But, I understand very well the pressures of the modern world, and pressures from peers, upon young Muslims, so I am going to do something I wish I did not have to do.

I am going to suggest, for those who for whatever reason can not or will not follow the way of life Allah has made lawful for you, an alternative that, while not right, will still protect you and your future marriage from the most severe effects of the harm that could come from wrong relationships. First let me suggest a common pattern of how boy-girl relationships can get started and how they can go so wrong. Possible likely steps in the development of a wrong relationship could be as follows: It makes me very sad to think this could happen to any of my very dear young Muslim brothers and sisters, but I am sure you know it is happening to some.

So I offer the following as a suggestion to those who for whatever reason choose not to live according to the Will of Allah. To those wonderful young Muslims who have been, and are, able to follow rightly the commands of Allah I am indeed most pleased and may Allah give you extra Blessings.

You do not need what I am about to suggest, just continue to live Islam in its purest form. To do this you have to set some limit as to how far you will go in the wrong boy-girl relationship. As I look at the likely steps in the progression of relationships I see that there is a natural point where the risk of harm, particularly leading to the greatest harm, becomes clear.

  • The 4 Stages of Dating Relationships

In that progressive sequence in the development of wrong relationships the point where you become at risk of greatest harm is when you agree to meet and be alone.

If you set the absolute limit at only those parts of the boy-girl relationship that can take place if you are never ever to be alone together you can still have quite a bit of the fun and pleasure of having as a friend a member of the opposite sex you like a lot, talking to them, and even being some sort of couple.

Actually this is a lot. The fact that many of our wonderful young Muslims, who have friendships with a member of the opposite sex, do sincerely have the intention of abstinence makes the commitment to never be alone together all the more likely to be effective. Still you are stealing some part of what is special and should ideally be held only until after marriage, but you are retaining the most intimately precious parts until they can be experienced rightly with the one you marry.

Remember, this can only work if that limit of never being alone together is totally absolute. To make sure this limit is never passed it must be understood that no person in the relationship would ever even suggest in any manner at all to the other that they should meet in a way that allows them to be alone together.

Make sure right from the beginning that the person you like understands how strongly you feel about this matter, and that they feel the same. If your friend were even to suggest meeting alone this should be sufficient evidence that the person you liked is not a right person to have a relationship with; and, you should be completely willing to end a relationship with anyone who would care so little about harming you and your whole future just to satisfy their selfish needs.

For this plan to work it is critical that the Ummah around you, your Muslim peers, feel so deeply concerned about this matter that they would not only look very unfavourably on those who chose to be alone together, but also on anyone who would even suggest being alone together.

This has to become an unbreakably strong social taboo.