How to cope with money worries - NHS
In fact, financial stress is the No.1 cause of relationship breakdown, Life Matters program about couple finance recently, and specifically how to deal a financial plan, whether through professional advice or more of a DIY. When it comes to marital problems, money fights are the second leading cause of divorce, behind infidelity. It's no secret that cultivating a solid marriage takes. While Financial Counselling can help address your money issues and reduce that anxiety, the strain placed on a relationship may not be so easily undone.
Acknowledge and accept emotions Bitterness, guilt, and frustration, usually associated with financial stress, will have an impact on your relationship with your spouse, children and even your faith. Understanding these emotions and dealing with them together can help a marriage stay away from disaster. Flow with these emotions, embrace them, understand their depth but use their force to fight the stress together instead of each other.
Financial stress is big cause of break-ups. How to money-proof your relationship
Once a situation is handled, there will be ample time for reflection and debriefing. To deal with financial stress proper teamwork, planning, and dedication are required so the couple can compromise and set a path for themselves which has their mutual content.
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Disagreement and stubbornness from either side can further escalate the monetary stress burdening the marriage. Do not be shy to accept help Burden due to financial stress can be a tremendous one for any marriage and accepting help might be difficult for a lot of couples.
One must consider enlisting help from appropriate sources. If a friend or family member can help you get back on track, accept their generosity. Minimize pressure Financial stress can consume a marriage.
Relationships under Stress | Financial First Aid | Money Trouble? You always have options
So, focus your energy on other chores. Remove yourself from worry and strain so that you can manage your stress-related burden, positively and efficiently.
Turn to your faith For some couples, having strong faith can be a rock-solid pillar in times of crisis. When financial stress is weighing you down, religion, belief, and devotional work can be instrumental in getting couples through such desperate times. Count your blessings Money-related stress tests the basic foundations of a marriage. A lot of couples stop looking at the blessings around them, focusing solely on the problems and the awful experiences they have.
This makes their spouses also feel angry and depressed. Take a deep breath and solely focus on the love you share with each other as a family. It's also because while the inflation rate has been low for some time, costs associated with raising a family keep going up. Childcare fees, premiums for private health insurance, and private school fees have all risen faster than the consumer price index.
Tough call Now, you might point out that some of this is the result of choices, and you'd be right. No one is forced to send their kids to private school, for example. But this is about stress, avoidable or not. Two out of five high school children do attend private school and having made that decision, it would be a tough call to pull them out.
Getting on the same page financially requires deciding on a shared vision for the future. And finally, there's no doubt that consumerism is a factor. The only way to get ahead in a capitalist economy is to resist the siren call of whatever the capitalists are trying to sell you.
But it ain't easy. The clarion call of our society is "spend, spend, spend", then you get smug commentators blaming you when you do and beating the drum of personal responsibility. It's a bit like the obesity epidemic — you're urged to eat at every turn, but it's your fault when you get fat. There's some suggestion from the economic boffins that wages could start to growbut there's also talk of rising interest rates, so I wouldn't bet on the pressure letting up any time soon.
If we don't play our cards right, our relationships could pay the price — and that brings its own form of misery, as well as being financially costly if you wind up in divorce or separation.
Infinancial stress was cited as a factor in more than one in four break-ups, just ahead of communication difficulties. That's according to Relationships Australia's survey of more than people, who were asked about their own break-ups and those of other couples they knew.
Inat the height of the global financial crisis, the same study found financial stress was even more prominent, contributing to one in three relationship break-ups. And communication difficulties were a factor in a whopping 37 per cent of break-ups. I was asked to speak on ABC Radio National's Life Matters program about couple finance recently, and specifically how to deal with the situation of the two partners not being on the same page about money.
Different routes You could obviously start by sorting out your finances, tightening your belt or getting a financial plan, whether through professional advice or more of a DIY route guided by technology.
But I think it goes deeper than the financial fix. The doyen of Russian literature, Leo Tolstoy, famously wrote, in the opening line of Anna Karenina, that "happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way". When it comes to money, it doesn't mean that every happy family has exactly the same amount or spends it the same way; it means every happy family has found a way of dealing with money that works for them. Some couples try to avoid conflict by having one partner manage the finances.
This can be a trap, not just because the outcome of financial decisions affects both partners but also because you may find yourself in the financial driving seat at some point because of separation, illness or death.
Fortunately this is changing.