Remember to consider the cost of this fear on your relationships, your own passions, and your Plan to be alone for short spurts. up to overcoming gradually greater fears only once fear subsides for. Originally Answered: Why do people fear being alone? and then often stay in a relationship, is related to a fear of being alone. And as . This can be very scary since there is no person to help us when we are confronted with our inner fears. So, how can you tell if the only reason you're in your relationship is because you' re afraid to be alone? There are a few key things you need to.
Gina was financially independent and could easily leave. Their children were all adults. There was nothing to keep her in this marriage. Yet, she was still there.
I hear this time and time again from both men and women. Why are so many people afraid to be alone? The underlying cause of the fear of being alone is self-abandonment. Imagine yourself as a baby being left alone -- a terrifying situation. As a tiny child, you cannot take care of yourself. You cannot get food to eat or water to drink.
You cannot change your own diaper.
Left alone long enough, you will die. As an adult, this is certainly not the situation. This is may cause a fear of being alone.
If you were to take full responsibility for yourself -- valuing yourself, listening to yourself, taking loving care of yourself physically, emotionally, financially and spiritually -- you might not fear being alone.
In your relationships, what do you do out of fear of being alone? Do you try to control your partner or others with anger, blame, tears or compliance? Do you put up with intolerable or abusive behavior? Do you rationalize that, no matter how bad it is, it is better than being alone?
Does it feel as if you can't go on if you end up alone? The truth is that the only time we actually feel alone is when we abandon ourselves. We may feel lonely when we want to share love with another and there isn't anyone there, or the other person is closed to connection.
Loneliness may also occur after the birth of a child, after marriage or after any minor or major life event. The fear of being alone can be caused by by many different things.
What Your Fear of Loneliness Is Really About
Maybe you were, or felt, abandoned at some time in life and came to associate being alone with being unloved or neglected. A fear of being alone can be directly related to lack of self-confidence and to the belief that activities cannot be enjoyed or even attempted if you are alone. Or maybe you just never learned to be comfortable while alone. Like anything in life, what has been learned can be altered. You can learn to be better at being alone without being lonely so that you have the choice of whether to be with others or not.
And when you overcome the fear of being alone, you instantly become more independent and confident as a result. In fact, there are many advantages to overcoming fear of loneliness. When you are alone you have time to think calmly and there is a special kind of peace you can experience only when alone.Are You Afraid of Being Alone?
Time spent alone sometimes can also make time spent with others even more enjoyable. Remember that being alone doesn't have to mean being lonely.
Treatment of Loneliness The alternative to viewing loneliness and the fear of being alone as a defect or as an unalterable personality characteristic is to recognize that loneliness is something that can be changed. It is also important to know that loneliness and the fear of being alone are common experiences. Loneliness is neither a permanent state nor "bad" in itself. Instead it should be viewed more accurately as a signal or indicator of important needs that are going unmet.
Loneliness and the Fear of Being Alone
The first step is to admit that you have a problem with being alone and that you would like to feel and behave differently.
Remember, we all have strengths and weakness and hiding your weaknesses takes up more energy than it does to work to overcome them or learn to live with them.
The most frequently used form of therapy is cognitive behavioral therapy CBTreality therapy and behavioral therapy. Working with an experienced psychologisttherapist, or counselor you can learn new behavioral approaches, new relationship and communication skillsand specific techniques to help you deal with anxiety and depression.
Relaxation and stress relief techniques are frequently an accompaniment to other therapeutic approaches. Relaxation techniques may include things like specific ways of breathing, muscle relaxation training, guided mental imagery, or soothing self-talk. Associating these relaxation techniques with being alone can help you deal with, and overcome, feelings of loneliness, depression and anxiety.
Medication can also be used. While they do not "cure" the fears of being alone, they can temporarily suppress the symptoms through chemical interaction. Another treatment for both loneliness and depression, especially in the elderly, is pet therapy, or animal-assisted therapy as it is more formally known.
Some studies and surveys, as well as anecdotal evidence provided by volunteer and community organizations, indicate that the presence of animal companions can ease feelings of depression and loneliness.
According to the Centers for Disease Control, there are a number of health benefits associated with pet ownership. Additional Information For more information about loneliness, the fear of being alone, and other mental health issues, please click on the linked websites listed below.