Six Ways to Build a Solid Foundation in Your Relationship
EliteSingles outlines the principles for your healthy relationship rulebook. Relationship rules: the foundation for happily ever after. Let's face it, unless you have a rock solid foundation in your relationship with your significant other, you will inevitably be on shaky ground. For some, this isn't. Relationships are like houses; in order for them to stand the tests of time, they need a good foundation. The very first thing you do when.
While it is easy to assume that your partner knows your wants and needs, this is often not the case and can be the source of much stress in relationships.
A healthier approach is to directly express our needs and wishes to our partner. Respect Your Partner's Rights. It is unrealistic to expect or demand that that he or she have the same priorities, goals, and interests as you.
Be Prepared to "Fight Fair.
- Relationship rules: the foundation for happily ever after
- Six Ways to Build a Solid Foundation in Your Relationship
- 10 Signs You Have A Solid Foundation For A Marriage
Healthy couples fight, but they "fight fair" - accepting responsibility for their part in a problem, admitting when they are wrong, and seeking compromise. Additional information about fair fighting can be found here. Fighting Fair Maintain the Relationship. Most of us know that keeping a vehicle moving in the desired direction requires not only regular refueling, but also ongoing maintenance and active corrections to the steering to compensate for changes in the road.
A similar situation applies to continuing relationships. While we may work hard to get the relationship started, expecting to cruise without effort or active maintenance typically leads the relationship to stall or crash! Though gifts and getaways are important, it is often the small, nonmaterial things that partners routinely do for each other that keep the relationship satisfying.
Outside Pressures on the Relationship Differences in Background.
10 Signs You Have A Solid Foundation For A Marriage | HuffPost Life
Even partners coming from very similar cultural, religious, or economic backgrounds can benefit from discussing their expectations of how a good boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse behaves. What seems obvious or normal to you may surprise your partner, and vice versa. If you are from different backgrounds, be aware that you may need to spend more time and energy to build your relationship.
Take the time to learn about your partner's culture or religion, being careful to check out what parts of such information actually fit for your partner. Time Together and Apart. How much time you spend together and apart is a common relationship concern. If you interpret your partner's time apart from you as, "he or she doesn't care for me as much as I care for him or her," you may be headed for trouble by jumping to conclusions.
Check out with your partner what time alone means to him or her, and share your feelings about what you need from the relationship in terms of time together. Demanding what you want, regardless of your partner's needs, usually ends up driving your partner away, so work on reaching a compromise. For many students, families remain an important source of emotional, if not financial, support during their years at the university.
Some people find dealing with their partner's family difficult or frustrating.
Relationship rules: the foundation | EliteSingles
It can help to take a step back and think about parental good intentions. Families may offer well-intentioned advice about your relationship or your partner. It's important that the two of you discuss and agree on how you want to respond to differing family values and support one another in the face of what can be very intense "suggestions" from family.
There are some people who seem to believe that "I have to give up all my friends unless my partner likes them as much as I do. At the same time, keep in mind that your partner may not enjoy your friends as much as you do. Negotiate which friends you and your partner spend time with together. Let one another know what your needs are. Realize that your partner will not be able to meet all your needs.
Some of these needs will have to be met outside of the relationship. Be willing to negotiate and compromise on the things you want from one another. Do not demand that a partner change to meet all your expectations.
Nothing frustrates me more than when my spouse comes home three hours late from work without letting me know. I was brought up in an environment where not communicating something like this meant that you were unloved. We must communicate with each other to make a relationship last.
Having too much communication will always be better than not having enough. When you have all of the information available, you both can make a better decision for your relationship that works for both of you. There must be a spiritual component to your relationship.
I will say that the amount of time you spend together exploring your spirituality is important, even if you come from two very different faiths.
There is always room for compromise, but there is no compromise on the need for spirituality. She had a similar culture shock with my faith. What we do, however, is study our faiths together, at the same time, and ask each other questions that we believe are important. Let me be clear: Your relationship has a soul, just as you do. Feed it and you will build a firmer foundation. Make sure there is time to have fun. Some weeks I put in 70 hours at the computer. There are weeks when my wife puts 70 hours at work.
Even though you might be tired, it is still important to emphasize the lighter side of life for your relationship to flourish. Schedule time to spend with your partner or spouse if necessary to make sure you have time for fun. One of the best ways to have fun is to experience something you both have never done before.
5 Ways To Create the Foundation of a Long Term Relationship
But the ordinary challenging stuff -- he leaves his dirty socks on the nightstand, she looses her keys -- isn't going to disappear once you say 'I do. Reillymarriage and family therapist 5. You can talk about the tough topics.
None of us are perfect at it, but when we can talk about difficult topics like money, sex, kids, religion or politics, and do so respectfully, we've got a good foundation for a happy future together. You respond to each others' needs for connection. This means that they connect in small ways when they spend time together. If one tells a joke, the other laughs. If one texts, the other texts back.
If one is hurting and needs to talk, the other stops what they're doing and listens. This builds a strong sense of intimacy and a strong sense of emotional connection over time. It also builds trust, which is fundamental in a good strong relationship. You make each other feel valued.
Is there a sense of safety, ease and comfort in the relationship? Does the person you want to marry enlarge, rather than diminish, your sense of possibility and worth?